Monday 16 August 2010

Bellamy Banned By Manchester City


It gets better and better! Bellyache has so upset Mancini that he has banned the Welsh bellend from the club. A six mile exclusion zone has been set up around the City of Manchester Stadium, with helicopter gunships patrolling round the clock in an effort to prevent Bellamy slipping through the cordon with his set of golf clubs.

A spokesman for the club said: "This is a code red situation. Bellamy is armed and highly dangerous. Members of the public are advised not to approach him under any circumstances."

Manchester residents, who may not know who Bellamy is, have been issued with a description of the Welsh felon. "Short, ugly, spitting teeth, wielding a golf club and yelling, "I hate Shearer, I hate Duxbury, I hate Mancini, I love 'Arry!"

The only hope of a peaceful resolution appears to be for Bellyache to be allowed to return to his hometown club of Cardiff. In anticipation, women attending nightclubs in the Welsh capital are to be issued with face guards and free courses in self defence.

Bellamy himself said, "Grrrrrrrrrrrrr!"

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Everyone reading this 'blog' says 'Zzzzzzzz'.

Hammersfan said...

Lots say "Grrrrrrrr". Fall asleep and you lose!

UKIT said...

nice one, like it!

Deane said...

I feel like someone who has been threatened by terrorists "you will praise Thatcher or we kill your children" (well I suppose they wouldn't be terrorists then) but anyway what have the 'appy 'ammers reduced me to Rooting for Manure I can't believe I actually want them to win 4-0 to get us out the relegation zone The shame of it

Anonymous said...

23:46, this can't be real.. get a life.

Anonymous said...

11@03 it's hf silly.......